Sunday, July 14, 2013

reflections of mine....

Hello to you, and thank you for stopping by for a visit.
Please know, I sincerely appreciate your visit ... really!
And be aware this is not my normal post, but
it does help me put these thoughts out into
the blogihood ... the friends and neighbors of
the "hood" I have come to appreciate help
me through each day just by knowing the world
I live in is bigger and better than that which I can
see in my immediate surroundings.

Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for the life
I have, for the area in which I live ... as someone
recently told me ... this is my home.

That struck a chord with me ...  he was right ...
this is my home and I chose it...

More on choices later ....

I share with you today some events from my past week
and things that have been rolling in my mind ...
not particularly illuminating things, but often times,
once the words are written, I find it helps align the thoughts
scattered ... eh?
{grin}

Mourning the loss of a giant ol' cottonwood ...

This week started with the loss of a gorgeous giant of a tree in our common
back yard.  You can see the stump of it here ... silly I am sure, my feeling
of loss, but the dear tree lost a big section last fall and this last week it split in
some high winds.  For the safety of all and sunder, including the structure
in which we live, it had to be cut down. 

It seems to reflect upon my current life. ... 
the bad must be cut out
to replace it with good.  The tree
will grow back, I know, but I
will mourn it's loss.

This week I had  a meeting with my lawyer.
The sum total of the meeting can be summed up in
him telling me that since I hired him, he can handle things and
"I should move on with my life as I wanted."

uh ... for some reason his telling me this put me in one of
those moments when you sit back in life and think ...

"what????"

I've come to several realizations since my meeting with the attorney ...

I'm not my mother, my daughters, my friends, my family ...
I'm not my co-workers, I'm not ....
Oh goodness ... one simple statement has put me
into puddles of reflections ...

To my life-experienced blogihood neighbors, you have much wisdom,
to my younger life-experienced blogihood neighbors, I wish you wisdom ...

I pose this hypothetical question ...

If you discovered you had to start your life over ...
Where would you begin? What would you do?
Do you know who YOU are?
Do you know what makes YOU happy?

Okay ... so, on that note .... 

I appreciate you.
Thank you for helping me through these thoughts.

This morning I rode my bike through my childhood neighborhood,
(probably didn't help the getting past the reflection of my life phase)
and as I rode with no direction in mind, just the thought of peddling,
I passed runners participating in our local
Missoula Marathon and Half Marathon.  I passed every type of
runner on my ride this morning ... I gave them encouraging words
as I passed them, because they were doing something ...
running or walking ... and obviously it meant something to them ...
Good for them!
On the other hand ... I was proud of myself too ...
I was on my bicycle ... peddling because it made me feel like
I was doing something good for myself and something that I
remember I used to enjoy ... a lot ... and it's good for my health.  
I got home and thought to myself "I deserve a reward ... " 
 then right on top of that thought was,
"my reward was the fact that I got out and did something
good for myself" ... I enjoyed the ride, I enjoyed the breeze,
I enjoyed the community of seeing the runners and my old
neighborhood ... my home ... and ...
I rewarded myself with ice-cold water 
{grin}

I had to run an errand this afternoon and had time to kill
before the appointed time of my errand so stopped by my
local Barnes and Noble ... I've forgotten how much I so
very much enjoy just soaking up the atmosphere of books,
the possibility of all that information, the wonder of everything
available ... and the laughs that are possible ...
by Cheryl Caldwell
I found this book by Cheryl Caldwell ... Follow Your Dreams [Except
for That One Where You Go To Work Naked and Dance the Polka]

Obviously ... it struck the chord of my life-reflective mood,
but better yet, it made me laugh.  I love the humorous ... and this
book reminds one not to take your life too seriously ... laugh.
Yes, I bought it ... purchase probably budget unwise ...
but I bought it ... and I will read it often.
I wish I could share every page with you ...
You too would laugh!

While at Barnes and Noble, I found this:
Thomas Kinkade puzzle
I adore puzzles ... it reminds me of my grandmother and I really
like the challenge ... it's one of those things I just can't pass up when
the puzzle is laid out waiting to be put together ...
just like reading a really good book ... you know you
have other things to do, but ... just one more ... :)
I also adored Thomas Kinkade and most of his works
of art.  I enjoy looking for the hidden items among his painted
objects.  I was saddened by the news of his death,
but saddened more by the news of the state of his life at his death.
His art and the meanings behind it will always hold 
meaning for me. Rest in peace Thomas.

Again, while at BN ... seriously glad I only had half and hour
to pass there ... I found this issue of Machine Quilting:
Judi Madsen article, pg 59,
Design Decisions for a Sampler Quilt
I picked it up for purchase right away because one of my
ultimately-amazed-by and in-awe-of quilters wrote an article
on quilting designs ...  if you aren't familiar with 
Judi Madsen, I wholeheartedly recommend you stop by her
blog  Green Fairy Quilts  and prepare to be amazed 
and inspired by her quilting!
Seriously.Beautiful.Amazing.Artist!! 

Also this past week, I took my daughters in to get hair cuts.
Actually, my oldest DD's first hair cut in over two years.
She's been growing her hair for Locks of Love:
Teensy-bit excited :-)
Above ... before.
Below ... after.
This was her idea and her desire to donate.
She's very happy with her hair cut and ready
to start growing it long again ...
I am proud of my little girl!

Little Miss Abigail also got a sassy new do to match
her sassy personality ... adorable!

The girls are away from home for the next two weeks.
I find I have lots of time on my hand for thinking ...
God Help us All!

On Friday, a summer storm came through:


Five minutes later:
If you look close, you will see the rainbow and blue skies.
Gary Allen's song "Every Storm Runs Out of Rain" 
is very appropriate here {wink}

A good reminder that storms may come,
rain may fall, harsh winds may blow,
but beautiful things will come in time...

Life ...
One storm at a time ...
One choice at a time ...
One thought at a time ...

and on that thought  .... 

I'm off to stitch ... one stitch at at time.
I've projects going, some to share at a later date ... 
during the upcoming Ho Ho Ho Hop for starters ... 

also have things in the works for the upcoming
Be a Hexie Queen:

I do promise more upbeat posts again soon...
really!!

I even have a giveaway planned for my Ho Ho Ho Hop post
in August, so please, if I haven't discouraged you with this post,
do come back for another visit ...
I will have quilt work to share 
{wink}

I wish for you a happy heart!









10 comments:

  1. I have no sage advice for you....
    I've not a clue what you are going thru, nor is it my business.
    But I will offer that you are uniquely you, created on purpose.
    Be true to you..take your time...the answers will come when they are meant to come.
    In the meantime, hug those girls.
    Gosh, they are darling!

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  2. A number of years ago I was in Florida on vacation. I found a T-shirt with a big sunflower on the front and around it was this saying: "...And then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom". I bought it and those few words helped my new future to blossom. I knew it was time to move on, make some positive changes and create the me I was meant to be. It took a while, but eventually it led to a really great life with me calling the shots and in control. I went took some self improvement classes, got involved with an organization I was passionate about, I grew and blossomed. Eventually it led to meeting a wonderful man and sharing a new life with him. All things work out, enjoy your journey and blossom.

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  3. I love both comments you have received. We re-invent ourselves from babe, to child, to teen, to young adult, adult, and into our winter years. But not to look at it as sadness, but a new journey that is you.

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  4. My goodness...so many words and thoughts! Love the sharing...and as one with age,or as "winter years" as Sharon so aptly coins it,my advice is for you to be true to yourself...but I can tell you are already there!To start a new chapter would certainly have its challenges, but right around the corner are new experiences, new memories and a lot of time to share with your little gals. You must be so very proud with the hair cutting...such a generous soul at such a young age...you've taught her well!

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  5. Such a deep and thought provoking post. I wish I could start my life over, but only if I knew then what I know now. I'd worry less about the little things and focus more on taking care of myself (moms so often neglect their own needs because their children come first.) I hope things work out for you and rainbows fill your sky. :O)

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  6. First can I just say, your reflections were heart felt...right in my heart...
    I know far too well about NEW BEGINNINGS....they hurt for a bit, but once you start swinging wellllll you get high from the view ahead....YOUR future is soooo bright, it blinds me...so Wendy, take it from someone who knows all about heart ache.....I WOULD NEVER change a thing....This is when we grow into better people. WE rid the roots that tangles us and takes our breath away and we pick ourselves up and move into a much more stable foundation and wait for the harvest to ... well let us just say, everyone will enjoy the sweetness that comes from it all....YOUR daughter looks beautiful with short new bob.... YOU are just having NEW Beginnings...clean those roots...wink...

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    Replies
    1. I meant to say both girls....their new do's ( as we say in Europe) are very becoming...

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  7. From a 'Mother'....to a 'Mother'.... Your Grama would be proud and would love the opportunity to put that puzzle togeter with you, be by your side and enjoy the conversation, enjoy watching you grow and be proud of the lady you have become.... Never sell yourself short again. You Mom is a very lucky Mom to have you!

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  8. May I just say? Never apologize for your courage...courage to take the steps to effect a healthy change, courage to carefully & wisely reflect on that change, courage to hang your heart out there and share your reflections. You are amazing, courageous one!

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  9. I've never had to start my life over but I have made a big change. Ten years ago we decided to take early retirement and move from the UK to France. It was a massive decision, to give up two full time jobs and have no income coming in. It was always our intention to do it at retirement age. We are now coming up to retirement age and due to get our state pensions in a couple of years. I can honestly say I am glad we did it 10 years ago as I don't think I would have the courage to do it now. Making plans is all well and good, but you never know what is around the corner, Whatever you want to do, go for it! Hugs Linda

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